Pseudo-bohemian comics galore, Batman!

I'd heard about "Ghost World" in the context of "Oh, so you HAVEN'T read the best comic ever? You should get on that." I always love conversations like that. In any case, I DID get down on it, popped in some K-C & Jojo (what were you thinking?) and read me some Ghost World.

Daniel Clowes' comic masterpiece didn't make many waves as a critical success until it's surprising underground following started causing a stir. This bizarrely drawn and decidedly anti-authoritarian style resonated with teens all over, trapped in a post-"The Graduate" universe, it seems. Eventually, glasses-wielding British critics read it and lauded it as one of the greatest comics of the era. Indeed they pinned the nail right on the pennyloafers.

A little bit about the premise. Becky and Enid are two high school graduates/hipsters with an uncertain future in a bleak small town. Their "Calvin & Hobbes"-esque wanderings and critical attitude towards mainstream suburban culture provide for plenty of laughs and deep introspection about their attitudes towards society and each other.

Clowes has a command of medium less like a wine and more like an artisan soda. Fizzy, bizarre graphic stylings, and slightly grotesque realism characterize the superbly paced visual style. And Clowes writes knowing his audience well. Enid and Becky are hilarious, snarky, deep characters whose shenanigans reveal more about themselves than most comic series ever do. Each panel is a well-crafted burst of thought and wit, compounded together weaving a fascinating story with some of the most memorable characters I've ever seen.

Highly recommended for all comic lovers, especially fans of "underground comics" (Bone much?...Don't answer that). My next project is to watch the 2001 film adaptation, which is apparently quite critically revered. Possibly due to the fact that Clowes wrote the adapted screenplay, but hey, what do I know? I haven't seen it yet. More on that later.

Updates: it's funny how blogs fall by the wayside

Ah, my friends who I have neglected for so long. It's hard keeping up with the joneses isn't it? And even harder keeping up with a blog. Especially with all the crazy stuff that's been going on with my life right now (of which I'm sure you're already aware), my creative outlets have certainly suffered. Here's to a resolution that I'll pick it back up again. Here's me giving a renuwed interest in blogging: not only introducing you to cool new music and movies, but giving maybe some more personal insights into this crazy world on which I walk around once in a while.

Something cool, gothic, AND validating.

Guess what this weeks' Discovery Download on itunes is? That's right, kiddies who follow my blog! IAMX! IAMX, being Chris Corner's awesome gothic techno-rock band that I've been blogging about for quite some time.

Just a brief review: Chris Corner of Sneaker Pimps fame started IAMX as a side project that garnered a small following in the English goth/industrial cirlces. IAMX released it's second album, "The Alternative" in 2007 to moderate sucess and then re-released it with some re-recorded tracks in 2008 for American markets. Spurned by some fun marketing campaigns and a sucessful tour, IAMX received nice critical kudos and released their third album: "Kingdom of Welcome Addiction" in 2009.

Amercia's favorite indietronica diva, Imogen Heap, caught wind of IAMX and Chris Corner and recorded a track called "My Secret Friend" for the new album. And apparently, itunes "discovered" this track too. I say "discovered" here as they tend to advertise as if these bands never existed before itunes... In any case, I'll stop my whining. I'm ecstatic for IAMX! It's a terrific opportunity for their music to get out in the net fo free! Plus, the song is pretty well done.

Check it out, download "My Secret Friend" from itunes and check out IAMX's previous albums for a fantasy ride of The Cure-esque gothic rock mixed with a little bit of Sneaker Pimps....It's pretty excellent.

Movie Review: District 9 (2009)

Oh yes...I'm back blogging with a vengeance, this time inspired by the greatest movie of 2009 (as of yet). First off, gotta say, Peter Jackson never has been one to make "simple" or one-off movies. Every undertaking he makes as a producer is a sweeping, epic story. District 9 continues his trend of Lord of the Rings and the (misguided, but epic) 4 hour King King and creates perhaps the most deep and exciting sci-fi film since The Matrix.

A VERY brief plot summary: Aliens have accidentally landed on earth and are "rescued" by humans. Tensions with inter-species conflicts escalate and they are placed in the "ghettos" of District 9. The movie follows one man, Wikus van de Merwe, who is deeply involved in the concentration camp like system of District 9 and shows his... well... "metamorphosis" into the harsh reality of alien captivity.

District 9 is brilliant; oh yes it is. But I'm going to point out briefly WHY it's so brilliant, plus some stuff that critics have been missing. The movie ALREADY has universal acclaim for some of the "meat n' potatoes" of filmmaking : great cinematography, terrific special effects and very skilled direction, courtesy Neill Blomkamp, nerd idol. Neill IS quite the guy in the nerd community, having directed all 3 Halo short films, and done animation animation for Stargate SG1 and Smallville. He's a newcomer to the big screen (I mean, I hadn't even heard of him before), but he does a terrific job of bringing the story to life.

Now, let's talk about why else it's brilliant. Number one reason is Sharlto Copley. This previously unknown actor absolutely give the movie all of it's emotional shock value due to his completely authentic portrayal of Wikus van de Merwe. He is quite good and, I'm suspecting, Oscar-worthy. Number two reason is that District 9 is a "message movie" with punch. Uncharacteristic (perhaps) of Peter Jackson's movies, District 9 pulls NO punches in blood, gore, body-counts, deliriously uncomfortable scenes. Some of it can be intense...but I say, grimace and bear it. Every blow, every blood-splattered corpse, it's all worth it. All of with clear backdrops of discussions of "human rights," race/gender/species, human cruelty, betrayal, etc... It's much like the Matrix in that it pairs very probing questions about human society with kick-ass alien butt-kicking action. Well, chest-kicking in the case of the aliens. It's a sci-fi movie that's got action, suspense, and all that jazz...but terrific emotion in all of the conflict that draws the audience into every scene.

MY RATING: District 9 is a must-see. Easily one of the best sci-fi films in recent memory, possibly even the best sci-fi film of the 21st century (sorry, AI: Artificial Intelligence...). In short, you GOTTA SEE IT, folks.

Episode 5, 07/02/2009 – Oh, and there’s the Rosetta Stone.

My last full day in London was devoted to my Mecca: the British Museum. Oh, and how found am I of the British Museum. The last time I went to the BM in the summer of 2008, it was completely overwhelming. As with so many of the galleries, almost every piece is crucial to our understanding of these ancient cultures. And so many of the pieces themselves are legendary, like the Rosetta Stone, several complete copies of the Book of the Dead, the Sutton Hoo helmet, etc. I resolved on my second trip to the museum, that I would take things more slowly, focusing only on the things I most wanted to see and hoping that I could get through everything in a single day. We started early, around 10 I think, and went straight to Egypt. Sorry Oceania, Korea, late Victorian porcelain, clocks of the ages, Africa, and the 20^th century in general: I just didn’t have time to get to you guys.

Triaging, we started in Egypt, as I said. First thing to note is that in Egypt, there are always 100 million screaming children with coloring books trying to shove American tourists out of the way. Oh, and at the exibit about Egypt, too, there are always 100 million screaming children with coloring books trying to shove American tourists out of the way. It wasn’t quite as bad this time around. I WAS able to hear myself think. The museum moved the Rosetta Stone to the bottom floor, so that thinned the crowds a little. It’s a little scary looking at a dead 6000 year-old corpse, better preserved than you when you die. And their teeth! Geez, I never wanted to brush my teeth so badly before in my life. One poor woman actually died of a bad abscess, a consequence of all of her corn meal being infested with dust and rocks over the years of desert winds. Ouch. Sorry madam. Ancient Egypt is irresistibly fascinating for me, especially middle and late kingdoms. The exhibit on Akhenaton was sadly gone, but the rest of it was just as thrilling as the first time I saw it. Highlight still being the famous “weighing of the hearts” passage from the Book of the Dead in full living Technicolor in front of my eyes…with zombies. No, really. Check it out and see.

Moving on, moving on. I spent a lot of time in the middle east exhibits, notably Islamic art/architecture, which was just getting started in 2008, but is now a flourishing exhibit. I found it cool that some of the relics/pottery/cool ass swords were found originally in Spain in places like Granada and Sevilla. Gotta rep my Muslim homie ancients. After Islam and Egypt was East Asia. The Japan gallery hadn’t changed a bit, but the scrolls and swords were pretty and shiny and that made me happy. The China gallery had acquired some new loveliness, especially a detailed scroll depicting scenes from Sayuki, the Journey West. Extremely cool and very rare. We perused some minor exhibits (not worth commenting on, tragically) and went to the new stuff, backwards of what I had originally intended.

The BM had a completely new exhibit for me. It was titled “Enlightenment” and served two functions. First, to air condition me, as the rest of the museum lacked A/C and the heat was SWELTERING. Second, to recreate how the original museum would have looked like in the 1800’s and to compile some of the original objects displayed in its early stages. Pretty neat, yah? It was fascinatingly cool. I especially loved the exhibit on sorcery LMAO still a topic of interest for scientists at the time. Also: it was funny how much of the history the old British folk got WRONG. For example, arrowheads were considered “fairy weapons” by some (seriously), and a lot of fossilized sea-creatures mistaken for mythical beasts. Oh, old British folk…Well, anyway, science has evolved. The new exhibit was a good break from my usual forte, and allowed us to cool down a little. Afterwards, we exited the museum to have lunch at a pub called “Munchkins” (LOLZ) located only a few blocks from the museum. I decided to be brave and sample my first bit of authentic British cuisine. I had a pork pie and it, believe it or not, was quite delicious. We went back to the museum after that.

Greek and Roman statues and pottery were the next steps and here is where we started hitting the wall. It was SO DAGGUM HOT IN THAT MUSEUM. Maybe the A/C busted, because confused-looking staff members were toting around portable A/C units to cool themselves. Greek and Roman pottery CAN all start to look the same, sadly, if you don’t know the mythology. We got overwhelmed by the mass of it all, moved on to statuary, (oh, Hadrian…) and then exited. We did manage to get to see the Rosetta Stone again, and like before, it’s practically a religious experience just looking at it. We owe so much to it…

I could really go on with everything else that we saw but I would bore you. Rest assured more details are available for the detail-minded. We dined again at Yo! (a different location though, I didn’t realize it was a chain restaurant). I need to expand that chain into the Americas, cause dammit, it’s too good to just be on one side of the Atlantic. Anyways, on to the other white meat of the day: SHAKESPEARE! Remember waaaaay back when I told you in Episode 1 that I was buying tickets to the Globe Theatre? Well, our efforts came to fruition that night when we were treated to EXCELLENT seats to see As You Like It. As You Like It is such a bizarre play, but I loved it immensely, especially the experience of being there. The acting was absolutely 100% top notch. The play was fast-paced, hilarious, rewarding to people who know the language well, visually spectacular, and most of all: fun. It was great fun. After the strange musical Monty-Pythonesque song-n’-dance number at the end, everyone took a bow. We walked out into the chill night air and back across the Millennium Bridge and I said goodbye to London. It certainly won’t be the last goodbye I’ll say to it.

We had the early morning flight out, so that was it for London. I want to thank you all again for keeping up with the blog and for listening to my ramblings. I hope it has been vicarious fun for you as it was fun for me. Now, I’ll be back to regular blogging, so stay tuned.

Episode 4, 07/01/2009 – Henry VIII, Baller or nasty ho??

When I made plans to return to England, I wanted to do things that I hadn’t already done before. Hampton Court was definitely on the list. An extremely brief summary: Hampton Court was a court that Henry VIII, pimp of England and father of Elizabeth I, made in the countryside to get away from the hassles of court in London (and the plague). The countryside is not so much countryside anymore and the royal family no longer uses the palace, but it’s now a very lovely museum which charges JUST below the fine line of “ridiculous” for entry. Dad and I took a 45 minute train ride from Victoria to get to Hampton Court and began our journey into the past.

Some commentary: it’s easy to understand Henry VIII by looking at his palace. Why do I say this? It’s the character of the place, really. The hunting lodge was where Henry would receive his guests, which doubled as the main dining hall. His bed was about 3 times larger than he was (and that’s saying something). And his page’s room was located RIGHT next to his, in the event that he need the slightest thing, he barely had to mumble to get the page’s attention. It’s good to be the king. Henry was such a complicated character. On one hand, he’s like the precursor to the entire show “Entourage.” On the other hand, he had so many venereal diseases, the guy’s body literally jiggered around when he was sitting down. Ick. Poor Catherine Par… It’s funny to me because Henry’s…err…lusty desires for a male heir created a whole new religion. A single man’s penis brought millions of future souls into the Church of England. And the man wasn’t too abashed about creating a gorgeous chapel to make peace with God… In any case, I’ll stick to describing the palaces, what say?

There are two palaces in Hampton Court. Henry VIII’s palace, which he created and used in his lifetime and wasn’t used much past then. About half of the spectacular grounds were furnished under his reign. And then you’ve got the William & Mary palace. Like in modern times, William & Mary loved the location, but weren’t crazy about Henry’s decorating sense. What’s a decent self-respecting monarchial duo to do?? Build another palace right next to/on top of it! Note that this is in a completely different style (Baroque) to Henry’s Tudor fancies. Oh, how I love the English…Or whatever William and Mary were…I’m not exactly sure. Netherlands, methinks.

In any case, Henry’s palace IS impressive, very Tudor and all that. A spectacular chapel finished by Christopher Wren is the highlight. We met this cute old British lady who helped explain to me while the styles/genres are all funky (solution: Christopher Wren designed it). She worked there…and you could tell she enjoyed it. I love meeting people like that. After we toured Henry’s palace, we went and had some victuals in the Hampton Court cafeteria, and coffee since I was half-dead from sleep.

We resumed the tour by going through part of the William & Mary side, then interspersing it with grounds exploring. The William & Mary side certainly is more elaborate and Baroque (and you know how I hate Baroque), but I think I ended up liking it better because it was better preserved and interesting. I learned a whole lot more from it than I think I did with Henry VIII (FAIL on the part of the audioguide by the way).

Interesting side note: William & Mary had some pretty neat taste in artwork, including a decent collection of original Caravaggios. I first heard about Caravaggio from David, one of my tios from Sevilla. Caravaggio was a 17^th century dude who pioneered Baroque painting and has got some CRAZY good pieces (look up his version of Judith beheading Holofernes if you want a shocker). Oh, and a clarification: my beef isn’t with Baroque painting. I love it very much. My beef, so to speak, is with Baroque architecture. In any case, Caravaggio is excellent, and it was really nice getting to see some of his better works in an unexpected place.

Now to the grounds. The grounds are the best part about Hampton Court. Henry’s are great little clumps of rose gardens, immaculately manicured (even today), flecked with statues of Greco-Roman mythological characters. Plus, it harbors (lolz) the largest continuous grape vine in Britain (lol pun…laugh, child, laugh!). William & Mary’s side is the larger, more sparse side. But then again, Henry’s side has a tennis court. Plus, a labyrinth... *naughty giggles*. I’ll just leave it at that.

Hampton Court really is a blast, and I’d recommend it highly. After finishing up with it (and the gift shoppe), we went back and caught the last bits of Wimbledon on the telly before dinner. Oh, and speaking of dinner, remember way back when we had our obnoxious/ineffective tour guide for the Bath/Stonehenge tour? Well, he had recommended to us “Ask,” a cheap Italian restaurant chain for dinner. Now, how do you pronounce that, exactly? When he was talking about it, it was like a scene out of “Singin’ in the Rain.” Ahsk, as he said, is the American equivalent of Ask. After that snobby and confusing suggestion, we decided to check it out that night. It was neither good Italian food nor cheap, and the portion sizes were too small. It was also unbearably hot in the restaurant. Thanks, tour guide. We got cookies from the market and went home.

Episode 3, 6/30/09 – Turners, Constables, Gainesboros, Neal’s Yard…and you.

Wednesday was chock-full of art museums and visits to some of England’s premier nerd hotspots. We did SO much and packed so much in such a tiny little space, I can’t possibly write down everything I saw. There’s just too much. It became a little overwhelming after a while too, because EVERY single work in some of these art galleries is a masterpiece. It’s hard to give each individual work the attention that perhaps it deserves. I’ll detail exactly WHERE we went and then make some general observations about what we saw there.

We woke up early and went to the Tate Britain, companion museum to the aforementioned Tate Modern. Whereas the Tate Modern is dedicated to all modern art, British, Spanish, etc., the Tate Britain concentrates specifically on the elite British painters over the ages. I’m not particularly versed in English painting. Most of the knowledge that I had of it has long since disappeared, so it was nice to have a most-authentic refresher of my memory. The museum itself isn’t tremendously large, but does a decent job of categorizing and classifying the paintings. Notable amongst what we saw were some classic paintings by the “Big Three” of English painting, so to speak. John Constable, Thomas Gainsboro, and J.M.W. Turner (oh, and some people add Joshua Reynolds in place of Turner…but it depends on how you ask). These folks are considered to be the Velazquezes of English painting. Turner is easily my favorite for his semi-realist/semi-impressionist style. The Tate Britain was allright…but it was deceptive. Apparently Wikipedia lied to me when it mentioned that the Tate Britain housed some works by my favorite surrealist painter Salvador Dali. In fact, Tate Britain contains NOTHING from non-English painters…and it certainly wasn’t at the Tate Modern (trust me, I checked). I left the Tate Britain satisfied, but at the same time disappointed.

It was getting around lunchtime so we stopped at an authentic British pub, called “Silver Cross.” The food was good. I should take a moment to comment on the “setup” of the traditional British pub. You walk in, take a seat yourself (a lot of people sit at the bar), you search over the menu for what you want to eat, you go up to the bar, order, and pay in advance. They give you a table marker and/or deliver the food to your table. And themz British…they love their beer…even at 12:30 in the afternoon.

Next spot: the National Gallery. The Nat. Gal. is the largest of the museums dedicated to painting, and the most diverse. I was quite pleased that there’s a terrific selection of works from just about every period, and from masters of British, French, Spanish, and German heritage. On the Spanish front, the museum contained a few lesser Picassos, one Miro, several Goyas (one of which famous), and zero Dali (oh well). In terms of other paintings, we saw it all! Everything from medieval Madonna and Childs to some “cartoons” (sketches) of Michelangelo and Leonardo DaVinci, to the Pre-Raphaelites, to Van Gogh and other Impressionists, to the classic battle of the Manet vs. the Monet, to the landscapes of Turner (a special exhibit was dedicated to the seascapes of Turner), Constable, etc., to even some more modern works like the hideous Mark Rothko and some new artists like Ellen Gallagher who I had never heard of before, but I ended up loving after we were finished. I do love the National Gallery.

As if the first two weren’t enough, we went to ANOTHER museum: the National Portrait gallery. I had been to the National Gallery before, but never to the National Portrait Gallery, so that made our trip especially significant for me. I ended up liking the Nat. Por. Gall. a whole lot. Contained in the gallery are portraits used by the history books, uber-famous portraits of artists, leaders, statesmen, kings…it was like a trip through a Norton Anthology. For example, I’m sure you’ve seen somewhere the famous full-length portrait of Elizabeth I. She’s standing on a globe with a scepter and orb in her hand, her face painted white and countenance confident. That painting, reprinted in pretty much every single book EVER written about Elizabeth I resides in that gallery. Add to that THE definitive portraits of (just a brief list): Henry VIII, Charles I, Charles II (etc.), Milton, Shelly, Mary Shelly, Blake, Keats, Wordsworth, Disraeli…it was the hall of fame for all persons famous and British. I particularly had a nerdorgasm by seeing Shakespeare and Byron’s portraits. The Shakespeare one is important because it is the only one that has a reliable chance of having been painted during his lifetime. Such coolness.

Okay, so now I’ve got to tell you about Neal’s Yard. The first rule about Neal’s Yard is “You don’t talk about Neal’s Yard.”….Well, it’s not EXACTLY like that. But Neal’s Yard is so not-touristy and such a good story to tell, I feel like I should start from the absolute beginning in order to tell you (shhhhhh) the beautiful secrets of this place. When I first went to London in the Summer of 2008, my mom and I went wandering the city with no particular goal. We stopped in this neighborhood called Covent Garden, which is famous for being the London equivalent of old SoHo. It’s got lots of high-end artisan shops and some designer clothing stores. All fine and good and everything, but I didn’t come to London to shop for £70 t-shirts. So we wandered a little more and we went through a few back alleys and came upon this place called Neal’s Yard.

Neal’s Yard is a tiny collection of shops built in a courtyard where all the back alleys meet. And it’s one of my favorite places on the planet earth. Neal’s Yard cannot be found by the casual tourist. We only accidentally fell upon it by mere chance. When one walks into the courtyard, it is immediately recognizable that this is a special place. Everything is vertical, from the decorations, to the street signs, to the flowers hanging on the windows. Neal’s Yard shines with charm, with funk, with what the old folk call “quaint.” The shops are tiny little boutique shops dedicated to things like skater fashion and herbal remedies. The restaurants are sandwich shops and salad bars. And the great thing is that the yard only comprises perhaps 800 square feet. Neal’s Yard has a spirit and a vibe of youth and of funk that I can only call veritably English. It’s tucked away in Covent Garden away from prying eyes, almost like one of those old fashioned Easter eggs of old. The locals there speak loudly and with soft giggles rolling like a soft rain in their speech. The air, mixed with bizarre perfumes, clashes almost harmoniously with the soft classical music from the salad bar and the post-punk from the skater fashion place in the alley. My mom and I went into one store, Neal’s Yard Remedies, and had a 10+ minute conversation with the store attendant (I’m convinced that if anyone on earth were the corporeal manifestation of a fairy, she would’ve been it) about the medicinal properties of clove. We bought some clove soap for a gift and left Neal’s Yard.

One year later, in the current summer of 2009, I decided to find Neal’s Yard again. This was no easy task. Like I mentioned before, Neal’s Yard can only be found by those who have been there before. Lol and I only happened upon it by accident the first time. Dad and I went to Covent Garden, like before, and tried to find Neal’s Yard. We spent about a full hour trying to find it (with about 10 minutes spent going into David & Goliath, aka indie t-shirts galore), but we COULD NOT FIND IT AGAIN. I was losing hope… It’s a whole lot harder than one may think because Neal’s Yard is not listed on any map. It is just too small. And it’s not very well documented on the internet either. Eventually in our wanderings, my memory caught a scent of a familiar sight, a skater fashion store that I remembered from last time. Sure enough, turn the corner, into the back alley, and there you have it: Neal’s Yard. I was so glad to have found it again. The very same vibe, the very same stores…. Nothing had changed in a whole year. The air still smelled of perfume and youth, and all around were people talking, texting, twirling their sunglasses, eating salads…enjoying themselves. Everything was practically the same. The skate shop still blared loud post-punk and the salad bar had its selection of classical muzak. Neal’s Yard Remedies was still there, though minus the saleswoman who reminded me of a fairy. I walked in and bought some clove soap for a gift and left Neal’s Yard again…glad, for some reason, that I found it almost exactly like I left it.

There you have it, that was the story of Neal’s Yard. Maybe sometime if we go to London together, I’ll take you there (if I can find it). After Neal’s Yard, we went back to the hotel and ate dinner at an Indian restaurant, which was delicious (I had lamb) and expensive. After that, it was time to bid adieu to Neal’s Yard in reality and welcome it back in dream.

Episode 2, 6/29/09 – I want to conquer Bath/Yo!

The next day was epic and chock-full of fascinating new things that I loved every minute of. One again, being nerds of the first degree, I and my father put on our list a bus trip out to Stonehenge and Salisbury to look at the Cathedral there. We managed to find a cool bus tour that would take us to Salisbury, Stonehenge, and Bath (pronounced “Baawth”) and back to London, all with a guided tour and a lunch included. Our tour guide was this salty little British dude called David, who had an attitude that almost (ALMOST) matched his ego. He was amusing enough, but wasn’t nerdy enough to keep me interested in what he was trying to say. Most of the time, I went off and did my own thing.

Okay, so first thing’s first. The bus ride to Salisbury took a little over an hour. Being exhausted from late night blogging, slept most of the way there, but did get a chance to enjoy the countryside a little. We went to Salisbury, which is a charming little town, very small, very British, the kind of town you’d imagine James Herriot was writing about in Scotland in “All Creatures Great and Small.” The Cathedral itself is gorgeous, a prime example of English Gothic. It’s extremely well-kept and under constant restoration. David (our ineffective tour guide) was more into telling unfunny/kitchy stories about the sepulchers, so I went off on my own to explore the magnificent stained glass and fan vaulting. Also housed within the Cathedral at Salisbury is one of the 10 surviving copies of the Magna Carta, which was pretty neat to see. It’s housed within the “Chapter House,” so-called because one was expected to read a full chapter from the Bible before conducting business in the room.

I’ve got to talk about this experience next, because I’ve told some of you about it and others not. Well, it’s no secret that Sevilla had been quite a…mystical…is that the right word?... let’s call it that for simplicities sake. It’s no secret that Sevilla was a challenging/interesting environment for all activities paranormal. Imagine my surprise to find something paranormal in Salisbury, in jolly old England! Here’s the facts-only version: I can feel weird things in general. And I certainly felt something in the cloisters in Salisbury. First thing I felt when going in there was that there were presences there…To me, they felt like recently-dead people. Like they had JUST died. Again, not a scary feeling at all, but just a feeling like indeed, they were there, interacting with me. Or, better said, just there. I snooped around and found that indeed there were people buried in the center yard of the cloisters, and in fact, some had been buried quite recently, one in 2006. Interesting, no? I’ve enclosed a picture of the grounds, not really to validate my story any: believe it or don’t, but so that you can get an idea of the beauty of the place.

After the incredibly cool Salisbury, we boarded the bus for Stonehenge. Stonehenge is SO BIZARRE! First of all: it’s out in the middle of nowhere, completely removed from any signs of civilization or any other natural landmarks of any kind. It’s situation on the Salisbury plain, with no particular purpose to its location…and that’s that lol. Stonehenge is both impressive and extremely frustrating. Here’s this incredible monument to something that someone somehow moved from Wales all the way down here. It was apparently important enough that for 1000 years people kept moving the stones down to this spot to make this bizarre monument to…who knows. The place is very photogenic, and I took plenty of cool photos, but at the same time, it sure is perplexing…

Ah, and now to Bath, my new favorite spot in England. Well, we got there and immediately I fell in love with the town of Bath. In the great weather we were having, Bath sparkles like a bright bubble in the sun, that’s the best way I can describe it. It’s fantastically scenic, combining funky shops and touristy things with fountains, monuments, historic buildings, thin roads, clean parks, cool air…it’s a little bit like heaven. Our first stop was actually NOT to explore the town, but instead to the Roman baths, perfectly preserved since the 3^rd century A.D. It was incredible to see such a well-preserved Roman monument, and the audio guide was very helpful to understand how the natural hot spring were utilized by the Romans to create this interesting combination between religion and relax. Oh, and in other news: I tried some of the natural spring water…It was awful. Mary I, Queen of England, described the water as “the water that is left over after boiling eggs”…and it tasted exactly like the water that is left over after boiling eggs…Yuck. But still fun to try. After the baths, we got some time to explore the awesome town of Bath. We wanted to go inside the Abbey, quite possibly one of the coolest Gothic buildings I’ve ever seen, but it was closed for the graduation ceremony of Bath university…What a place to be graduated in! In any case, we wandered more around the town. I have decided that when I conquer England, I will erect my palace in Bath, cause it’s pretty much the coolest city ever.

The bus ride back to London took a few hours, and we got to see the pretty rolling hills of the countryside, which was new for me, since I’m more used to urban England. When we got back, we spent some time shopping in Piccadilly Circus. Now, I’ve GOT to tell you about where we went to dinner. It’s officially my new favorite restaurant…ever. It’s a sushi joint called “Yo!” and it’s the funkiest damn thing on the other side of the Atlantic. It’s decorated like a combination between arc deco and “harajuku” and its musical selection was like they took my ipod and put it on shuffle (eg. Chemical Bros., Moby, The Cure, etc.). Everything was compartmentalized: you went to the table and were presented with holes in the table that held chopsticks, ginger, wasabi, soysauce, soysauce dishes, and a choice between flat and bubbly water. It was fantastic. And the sushi came “floating” on a conveyor belt in little plastic “bubbles.” Plus the quality was fantastic. Since it was a Monday, we were treated to their “Blue Monday” special (conjurs up New Order melodies, doesn’t it?), which meant that everything was a cheap 2.15 pounds. We nommed away at this delicious sushi and enjoyed the fun atmosphere. It’s easily the most fun I’ve ever had eating in London. Just opening a place like “Yo!” back in the States…wow, that sure would be incredible/quite profitable. It was a terrific memory and the perfect end to a perfect day.

Episode 1, 06/28/09 – London Calling, yet again.

Hello once again, folks! In the spirit of keeping the blog more current, I’m updating more frequently now that I have more time. I’ll give you all the details about my fantastic England trip, and as always, try to provide witty commentary on all of the eccentricities of our cousin folk across the pond.

Well, I got in the day before, but I was SO dead tired so I reunited with my father, got some fish, and chips and went to bed. That was that.

Next day was the first official day in Jolly Ole England. It feels so good to be back in London, my favorite city in the world. So much has changed from when I was here a year ago, but at the same time, it’s still the same city. Everything feels a whole lot younger, a whole lot hipper, cleaner, and certainly hotter. This trip, I’m concentrating on all the things I didn’t do last time, and doing again some of the things I enjoyed so much the first time. I’ll spare no expense in giving you all the gory details on this one folks. London is a Calling (if you’ll pardon The Clash reference) that I simply can’t avoid telling.

Day one included some new stuff to fill my nerdy preoccupation with museums and art and all that. The newly opened Tate Modern art museum was the first stop, a separate compendium from the Tate Britain containing all the modern stuff from the late 1800’s till now. It was not quite as large as the building makes it out to be, but there is plenty packed in the space. It’s a fine museum, but lacks organization. You kind of gotta wade amongst the icky stuff (that idiot Mark Rothco) to find the gems. Some of my favorites were some very famous pieces by the Surrealist Joan Miro and pre-Cubism Picasso. Since I had learned all about this in my Spanish art class, it was pretty much a nerdorgasm. Oh wait, did I mention nerdorgasm? I totally had one when I realized that one of my idols/favorite artists of all time was kept within these hallowed walls. Wedged between a room filled with Russian WWI-era propaganda and more abstract Ukranian stuff is the Andy Warhol room. ZOMG. Andy Warhol! The godfather of Pop Art and one of my all-time biggest spiritual/artistic influences. They had one of his (many) reproductions of Marilyn Monroe and another extremely famous piece called “Gun” (yes, I know that he has about 100 pieces called “Gun,” but this one was the big one). Plus, the wallpaper of the damn exhibit was Warhol’s own “Cow” wallpaper. It’s so hip, so nonsensical, so popart. It’s delicious. Almost as delicious as Campbell’s Soup, really.

Moving on, that was about it for the Tate Modern. On to the next stop, which was the Globe Theater to purchase tickets for “As You Like It” for Thursday. Expect lots of details about that later. I’d already done the whole Globe tour thing, so no new developments there. Now, I’ve got to have a discourse about the food here. Yes, British food sucks. That’s the simple fact. Pork pies taste icky, and tomatoes for breakfast is just a bad idea. That aside, the food in London is spectacular because it is such a cosmopolitan city. We went into this one REALLY super chic, super cool hotel for lunch. I’ll show you some artistic pictures I took of it. It had the best tuna salad sandwich and chips I had tasted in a long while. Aaah, back in the saddle again with London cuisine, indeed. It’s good to be home. Post lunch, next stop on the nerdmobile was new for me: the Victoria and Albert Museum.

The Victorianalbert (that’s how it’s pronounced, really) is a big arts/crafts/ “wears” museum. It’s incredibly cool. The kind of stuff that it has ranges from Medieval stained glass and silver collections to Japanese cookware and houseware to Persian rugs to British Jewelry over the ages…And even a small collection of paintings by masters like Turner and Reynolds. The whole museum is incredibly overwhelming, it’s impossible to do the whole thing in a day, let alone a few hours. We triaged what we wanted to see (Japanese swords, British Catholic sacristies, and miniatures being high on the list) and were blown away by everything we saw. Particularly impressive was a collection of plaster casts of famous monuments and statues. Yes, you heard right. We’re not exactly sure HOW they did it, but back in the 1870’s, the museum started taking plaster casts of famous objects/facades/statues from around the world and bringing it to the Victorianalbert. For example, there is a 2-piece, completely life-sized plaster cast of Trajan’s column in Rome in this museum. AKA THAT’S FRIGGIN HUGE. It’s extremely impressive. And even a full façade of a church in Germany. It’s incredible. I wish I could have taken pictures, but if you even get the chance to go to London you MUST GO and see it for yourself.

We really honestly did get exhausted by the museum, so we got dinner at this really cool Italian restaurant called Villa Rosa (the waiter made fun of my Spanish accent when I was ordering) which had very good food for a good price. Then we went to bed. Great first day back in the city of the Brits.

Episode 23, 6/24/09-6/25/09 – It’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday…aka the final Brownie con Sandy.

Like all good things, Spain had to come to a close. My intention really isn’t to do a whole lot of philosophizing about all the things I learned from the trip. I promised I would detail all of my experiences and present them as written word, so I’ll just do that to close off this journal. Expect maybe a few more posts detailing specific cultural commentary every once in a while, perhaps. Other than that, I am done. A special thanks goes out to the dedicated people who follow this blog and who keep in touch with everything I’m doing during the summer. But one last thought: this certainly has been a trip. I feel like the person I was stepping out into the streets of Sevilla is not the same person boarding the plane back to England. I’ve changed. All of my experiences, both the horrifying and the wonderful, have shaped me. I’ve changed. That’s all I can say. Most of all, I want to give thanks for the beautiful and deep friendships I’ve made on this trip – friendships that I hope will last forever. Anyways, back to the details of how this trip ended and as to my plans from here on out.

Friday was the last day I would spend with my friends before leaving for London the next day. As such, we wanted to make the most of it, so Sarah devised lots of fun activities for us to do to keep us entertained. That Thursday I spent the majority of the day with the tios, Nick and David, wandering around El Centro, I had to say goodbye to my Mecca, FNAC, and buy a Paradise Lost CD. After that, we meandered to the river and walked along Paseo de Cristobal Colon, on one of the hottest and most beautiful days of the year. We went back to Graffiti Bridge (no, not the Prince movie) and sat and looked at the art. Then we walked and absorbed the heat of the sidewalks and the coolness of the shades under the trees near the river, interspersing conversation with periods of quiet glances at the sparkling water. It was just how I wanted to remember my last days in Sevilla, so it was excellent. Thursday night we went to Colloniales, a famous tapas bar. I was in a noxiously bad mood, the cause of which I won’t go into here, so I left early to sleep it off. No reason to ruin my final memories of Sevilla, right?

Friday was the jam-packed finale to the symphony of Sevilla. I woke up early to go shopping with Katie, Sarah, Holli, Frenchie (Benji again), Bobbie, Caitlin, and Tiffany. We got a lot done, and Caitlin and Bobby (literally) took bits of Sevilla with them. I bought some last final gifts: one really metal lookin’ bracelet from a gypsy fo myself, a really cheap yet high quality fan for my mom, and one more shotglass (who for still to be determined). I went back to school to check my email, went to lunch back at “home,” then reunited at Burger King for the final Brownie con Sandy. Brownies con Sandy had become our official mascot of the trip for our group, so we bittersweetly chowed down on these delectable Spanish treats before going back to the states where they don’t have this mystical dessert.

And characteristically for our group, we went to TGI Fridays to celebrate in American style, our last time together being able to drink below 21 lol! The whole group was there (even Stephanie came back in time from Ronda to join us!). I said goodbye to Greg and Nick and David at the time (though I’d see the tios a little bit afterwards, story pending). Afterwards, the majority of us went shopping one last time. I visited JVC, Pull & Bear, then El Corte Ingles with everybody before I had to go back home. It was sad, saying goodbye in Corte Ingles to all of these people who I had come to know so well. I won’t get too sentimental, because hopefully I’ll see them in a month or two, but we all felt here that a good thing was coming to a close. I went back home. Then, because David had been borrowing “Wuthering Heights” and I needed something to read on the plane, I reunited a final time with Nick and David to pick up the book, said goodbye, and then walked back to la casa to pack up. It was especially sad, these final goodbyes. But I know that this is only the beginning of the friendships that I have made here. The best is yet to come.

I won’t bore you with all the details, but I said a strange/awkward goodbye to my señora, glad that our strange relationship was finally over. I went to the airport, got on a plane and ended up in England. As to the future of this blog, I think I’ll continue it in England. Goodbye Spain, and thank you.

FIN.

Episode 22, 6/19/09-6/21/09 – Granada: the End of the Beginning is the End.

Our last excursion of the summer was sort of like the End of the Beginning is the End (yes, like Smashing Pumpkins). We went to Granada, a small, interesting sort of city that wields massive Moorish influences from way back when it was the last stronghold of Islam and before Ferdinand and Isabella decided that Islam was uncool. In any case, it was a very bittersweet time for everyone in the sense that we were definitely ready to go home, but still wanting some last extra fun time in Spain. We traveled there by bus, yet again, and stayed for two days, which left me feeling like I had adequately explored everything it had to offer.

We stayed at this little hotel that gave me memories of California. There was a little veranda outside of our room, the kind that you could sit all day and watch the world pass by. It’s the kind that I’m sure fascinated writers like Steinbeck. Sadly, I did no serious writing there. I stayed with Nick and David…naturally meaning that our trip was filled with fun oddities like examining the lyrical structures of LFO and their failure at making good raps. I got in the hotel and went swimming in my shorts, neglecting to bring along swimtrunks. It was cold (believe it or not, in the 100+ degree heat), but refreshing.

First stop was the Cathedral at Granada. Not my absolute favorite Cathedral (Toledo is still da bomb), but it was certainly interesting. It’s very white inside and very Baroque. And as people know, Baroque is not my fav. It was visually stunning, but lacked a lot of the cool artistic and funky detailing that the Cathedral at Seville and the mosque at Cordoba have. I won’t really go on because I can’t say much more… Oh wait, I will say that it did at least contain some cool pieces of art that we had been studying, notably a small single-block statue of the Virgin Mary that is cool and extra-virgin and all that.

Next stop: DEAD BODIES MWUAHAHAHAHAH!...No, really. The corpses of the famous and very cool Reyes Catolicos, Ferdinand and Isabella. Oh, and Juana La Loca and Felipe El Hermoso too, if you call within the next five minutes. For only two easy payments of 19.95, we got to see the Capilla Real (Royal Chapel) which contains the sepulchers of these famous Spaniards. It was super well decorated and very cool. We even got to descend into the crypt and see the coffins! Very metal! In other news: ancient Spaniards were short. They made me feel like a giant. I wonder how Nick would have held up in the Middle Ages….

We got some free time after that, so I went shopping with my harem of girls (so to speak). In the kitchy touristy shops we found Arabic teas, teapots, silks, fans, 365 sex positions calendars, and even keychains! The girls loaded up. I bought nothing: as there was no FNAC. Afterwards, I went back to the hotel, chatted with the tios a bit (my roommates, rather) and went up for dinner, which was a nice meal prepared by the hotel.

After dinner, it’s apparently a tradition to climb up to el Mirador de San Nicolas (if I remember right), which is a point overlooking most of Granada. The climb up to said point, however, is arduous. After huffing and puffing and blowing down many houses, we finally reached the top and played Japanese tourist a little and took lots of fun pictures. It was a great view. I’ll attach pictures to illustrate. After that, most people went to a discoteque, but apparently I didn’t get the memo about bringing nice clothes, so I went with Stephanie, Rachel, Frenchie (aka Benjamin, who had followed? us to Granada), and Holli out to a VERY cool Arabian tea parlor for some kick-butt tea! I ordered “Mil y una noches” which is 1001 nights, off of the classic tale concerning Scheherazade. It tasted like 1001 nights indeed. The whole experience was easily one of the most authentic and fascinating experiences I have been to in Spain thus far. It made the trip to Granada more than worth it. That was it for day one, but since little happened on day two, I’ll keep both in the same blog post.

I woke up early and Nick, Dave and I all went to get some breakfast in the hotel. We stocked up on biscuits/muffins for later and joined the group for the Alhambra, which is the big ass fort that the Muslims built to protect Granada from those shenaniganzing Christians. It was pretty interesting and well preserved, relatively. I think I’m biased towards Sevilla’s Real Alcazares in terms of coolness, though. At least the Alhambra had some great views and cool architecture. Again, pictures tell a thousand words in this instance. We left for Sevilla, stopped for lunch at this strip mall. 90% of it, not surprisingly (DAMMIT), was closed on Sunday (thank you Catholicism). We got RIPPED OFF at this damn Italian place, which put me in a severely bad mood. WTF kind of a restaurant makes you pay for pasta sauce as an EXTRA condiment??? Seriously folks, that kind of shit is just whack. After sulking and trying to get some sleep on the way back, we finally got back to Sevilla, where I finished a paper and studied for exams. Like I said before, the End of the Beginning is the End.

Episode 21, 6/16/2009 – The hill of stairs…and other stories.

The thing about Madrid is: besides art museums and nerdy stuff, there really isn’t that much to do. We found this out on our last day. We woke up and went back to the Prado to see the remaining things we hadn’t seen. Mostly Goya, actually, so reference by blog entry in Episode 20 for all about Goya. Other than that, we were officially done with nerdy things.

We went from there to a gigantic flea market kinda thing that is famous for being the largest flea market in Spain. Quite honestly, it was the largest junk market in Spain. Every stall had the exact same stuff…and it got old. VERY old. We wandered around the gigantic expanse for quite some time. I did find one interesting thing though: a stall selling old vinyl records. I found a few I didn’t have, but cost and transportation issues persuaded me to let it be. David, independently, found a record store that had some pretty cool stuff. After lunch (I ate a loin bocadillo, which was terrific!), we went back to the record store so David could buy a vinyl for his brother, all of the while, we were under the assumption that we had time to get back to the bus station on time.

And here’s where our adventure begins. We left our bags at the hostel, so we had to take the metro back to the hostel to go pick them up before taking the metro to the bus station to catch our 15:00 bus to go back to Sevilla. 13:45…we have plenty of time, right? Suddenly after the hostel, 14:00. Allright, we have an hour. Not bad, right? No one was concerned except for Rachel, perhaps foreseeing that this could be a problem. The metro was moving reallllyyyy slowly that day and we had a long way to go. Suddenly, it was 14:30 and we were less than halfway there. Oh snap. Katie, David and I officially started freaking out. This would be BAD. The tickets, 17 euros apiece, are nonrefundable, plus we had no idea if there were later busses, PLUS to make it worse, we had class in the morning. No WAY we could miss this bus! Time continued to pass, quickly, quickly. It was 14:45 and we were two stops away from station. They were probably already boarding now…We would have to run like hell in order to make it. 1 stop to go…we have 8 minutes to get there… Oh god. We started to get really depressed, knowing that we would inevitably lose the bus and end up shelling out more euros for another ticket. Our stop finally! We have hope! We have four minutes to get there! We grabbed our things, including Rachel’s rollybag and RUSHED. David and I fled like we were being chased, dodging through rude/indifferent Spanish people who could care less if you are in a hurry. I checked my cell phone. 2 minutes! We MIGHT MAKE IT! We turned another corner in the metro, looking for the exit and LO! It’s a GIGANTIC WALL OF STAIRS! Over 4 flights of stairs, maybe over 150-200 feet in the air. There were escalators, but they were too slow. I heard Katie behind me shout “HELL no!”. I didn’t look back. David burst up those stairs with his backpack and I followed, gasping heavily. We got to the station, went out to the platforms and searched frantically for our bus. THERE IT WAS! The bus driver was talking to another person on the side. David checked to make sure it was the bus to Sevilla and then he and I boarded the bus. You’ve got to understand the image here, to fully appreciate this. We had made it from the metro stop to the bus station in under 4 minutes, carrying all our luggage and mounting a gigantic flight of stairs. Here we were, two guys with backpacks, absolutely drenched in sweat, sombering through the aisles, panting like rabid dogs. We got seats together and we laughed, intermixed with relief gasping and panting. We shared a moment of celebration and gasped collectively for air. Katie and Rachel had now boarded and we were set. About a minute later, the bus pulled out of the station at approximately 15:01.

Whew… That was our story. The rest of the bus ride was filled with naps, David and I watching “Airplane!” and me gasping for breath, still. It was an epic ending.

Episode 20, 6/14/09 – The Rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain…or not.

We woke up early to start our first uninterrupted day in Madrid. I must explain episode title first and foremost: up to this point in my trip, it hadn’t rained a single day. Not a drop. Later in the episode, this detail will change…to ghastly effects.

Our first objective was a little bit of touristy thisandthat. We went to the centre of Spain, literally. The zero-kilometer marker, the exact center of all of Spain. It was not all that interesting, really. The statue of Carlos III and the famous statue of the Bear eating a strawberry tree were kind of cool, though. Oh well, moving on. A more interesting photo opp was at the Plaza Mayor which is one of the most Baroque of Madrid buildings and also one of the most famous. We took lots of pictures, then went to lunch at this excellent place called Casa Rua, which makes these KILLER fried calamari sandwiches for only 2.25 euros. Ideal for starving/cheap American travelers. It was definitely a food highlight of the trip.

Okay, now that we got all THAT out of the way, time for the REAL meat of the trip: nerd museums! We planned both our Barcelona trip and our Madrid trip VERY well so that pretty much every museum we went into was free, or discounted. El Prado offers 2 free hours on weekends, so we went there twice to take advantage of its epic size.

Our first stop was El Prado, which is Spain’s version of the National Gallery or the Louive. It was (until I went to the Reina Sofia) the most incredible art museum I had ever seen in my life. It houses permanent collection of Spanish art from the Roman period all the way to the 18^th century. Needless to say, it’s the authority on all things nerdy. Pictures weren’t allowed (see a pattern here?) so I’ll describe to you some of my favorites. Taking that Spanish art and architecture class turned out to be the best thing in the world for my personal understanding of art (Spanish and otherwise) AND for my enjoyment of all the things I saw. A major highlight of the museum is its collection of the works of Diego Velazquez, probably the best Spanish painter of all time. His work “Las Meninas” is a staggeringly realistic and enigmatic portrayal of the court life of Felipe IV. We had studied it for quite some time, so it was mind-blowing to see it in person. Another of my favorites, “Los Borrachos (aka El Triunfo de Baccus),” was on display. Essentially, every major Spanish artist of the renaissance to the modern era is there. Also a notable highlight is the Pradi’s extremely impressive Goya collection, the highlight being the uber-famous “Saturn devouring his children,” a work that I’m sure you’ve seen in an art history textbook somewhere. It’s a delicious depiction of the Greek god Chronus devouring one of his sons so he cannot usurp him. It’s great cannibalistic stuff! Plus, it’s the most mysterious and blatantly disturbing of Goya’s “black paintings”. A definite must-see for Madrid. The Prado also is huge, so we spent two hours there and decided to return later for a second attempt.

After the Prado, we went to the OTHER famous museum in Madrid, called the “Reina Sofia”. What the Prado lacks, the Reina Sofia has. Meaning, that as the Prado covers Spain from infancy to Siglo XIX, the Reina Sofia covers the rest of the “Modern Stuff”. I’m not much for the middle ages…this Reina Sofia was especially a nerdfest for me. It’s a bit smaller than the Prado, so we were thankfully able to cover it effectively in one day. As a lot of my close friends know, Surrealism is my marmalade jam, and the Reina Sofia just so happens to have the largest permanent collection of Spanish Surrealism in the world. From the early conceptions of Dada (a few works here and there by Hoch and others) to full-fledged Dali, the museum had it all. And what made it even better was that I had taken that art class and learned better to appreciate some of these works. Highlights for me included viewing rooms with Surrealist films (aka “Un Chie Andalou”), and lots of works by Dali and Miro. The Reina Sofia also houses another powerhouse of Spanish painting: Pablo Picasso, including his piece de résistance: Guernica. Guernica is a terrifying piece depicting the German bombing of the town Guernica. I’m sure you’ve seen it somewhere; it’s too famous for you not to have at least seen a glimpse of it. It is extremely impressive in person. I think I like the Reina Sofia better than El Prado, simply because it contains more pieces from genres I like.

Oh ho, HOWEVER, being that Reina Sofia is the 19^th century till the modern day, it indeed is haunted by the hideous spectre called “Contemporary Art”. The kind of contemporary art that consists of a painter painting a canvas one shade of solid blue…Brilliant! Add a few stripes here and there, a masterpiece. It’s not my marmalade jam, so say the least. The fourth floor of Reina Sofia is dedicated to this…contemporary art…Katie, David and I explored the 4^th floor and just laughed at half of the art there. I mean, seriously though. It doesn’t take much skill to paint a canvas a single color… David and I had some fun with this though. We donned our New Zealand art critic accents and started conversing in mock-seriousness about the thematic depth of all artwork there. It was hilarious. We came upon one such masterpiece, a canvas sloppily colored in blue with some red and black lines. There was another girl there, who was sitting watching us explain all these deep themes that we were finding lol. She actually believed us for a little bit, and then we caught her giggling like a schoolchild when our accents just got a little too silly for her. Haha, it was a fun time.

David and I went to Retiro park for a bit afterwards. It was pretty, but we really didn’t get to see the cool parts of it at all. Mostly because our schedule was so tight. We walked home, past the Arco de Carlos III, another one of Madrid’s famous landmarks, and then went to go buy dinner. Madrid isn’t quite as expensive as Barcelona, but we were getting to the point were we really couldn’t afford going out to dinner and the 10+ euro entrees accompanying. We grabbed some sandwich material, frozen pizza, salads, and of course Fanta and wine to make tinto de verano and we dined in the hostel. I remember that meal being particularly fun, as we touched on topics everywhere from old relationships to favorite vegetables to favorite 90’s TV shows. Fun times.

Here is where the night took a strange turn. Rachel and I wanted to go to a techno discoteca while we were in Madrid, and we selected an 8-story extravaganza called Kapital as our first choice. However, upon learning that the entrance fee was 10 euros, we declined, and spent the next hour and a half searching the internet for cheaper alternatives. We found none. It was disappointing. Meanwhile during Rachel and my search for alternative discotecas, David and Katie were chatting with our hostel roommates who were from northern Spain. They were going out to a small local bar and invited us along. Rachel and I had given up so we agreed.

The bar was bizarre. That’s the best way I can describe it. It seems to me like all Spanish bars either try too hard to be hipster, or are just inferior copies of “The Cave” back home. The bar was guilty of the former. It had cool colored lights and lots of obscure/funky pop culture material, music alternating between The Cure and Juanes, and television sets playing “Evil Dead 2” and hideous 70’s Japanese horror movies. Funky, and everything I should love. But the problem was that it was just too much, adding to the fact that rude Spanish men and about 90% of the bar was smoking in our faces. Plus, the drinks were DAMN expensive. I ended up getting a coke, sitting like a wallflower with Katie and David while Rachel attempted to converse with these bizarre Spaniards. I quizzed Katie about her favorite things, and then when that was over, we got bored and went home. Not our best night. We wanted ice cream, but the damn place was already closed. Oh, you were wondering how the rain came into the story? Well, as we were walking to and from the bar, it was RAINING! Not even hard, just this depressing drizzly rain, just hard enough that you wish you brought an umbrella, but not hard enough to necessitate waiting the storm out. Since we hadn’t seen rain up to this point, it was hilariously ironic. Overall: a mixed day.

Episode 19, 6/13/06 – El Greco was a straight up gangsta.

Our excursion to Madrid for the 4 day weekend started on the night after Corpus Cristi (that Thursday night). I had scheduled our bus route to Madrid overnight so that way we’d have more time to spend (considering we missed a day due to Corpus). It was a brilliant idea in theory, but not so much in practice. Our group consisted of Katie, Rachel, David and myself. Everyone except Katie attempted to fall asleep and basically failed miserably. Sleeping on a bus in uncomfortable bus seats with no working air conditioning…it just doesn’t happen. We arrived at the Madrid bus station a little groggy, quickly downed our prepacked bocadillos, and then took the metro to our hostel.

Our hostel was nice, but more like a hotel, lacking the intimacy and funkyness that we loved so much when we went to Barcelona. Add to that a general sense of anesthetic unfriendliness…and well, that’s that. We left our bags and went via Metro to Plaza Eliptica to go see Toledo.

Doing Toledo earlier on was a great decision, especially in part because the weather was so excellent. Toledo is kind of like the idyllic image of a shining city on a hill. It’s this gorgeous town (definitely not city) situated on some of the prettiest hills I’ve ever seen in my entire life and covered with quaint little houses. It really hasn’t changed all too much design-wise from when El Greco was painting it in the Middle Ages. Speaking of El Greco, sort of like how our Barcelona trip was a tour of Barcelona through Gaudi, Toledo was a tour of Toledo through El Greco, one of the best painters in the history of Spanish art.

Gotta explain a little about El Greco before I continue. Literal translation of his name is “the Greek.” This is because he was Greek. No, really. How apt. His real name, Doménikos Theotokópoulos, is far too complicated for the history books apparently, so they gave him this catchy nickname that sounds like a delicious Mediterranean entree. El Greco was also the original inventor of West-Side gangsta rap hand gestures. Also a “no, really” moment. El Greco paints in a style unlike any other. His figures are extremely elongated (think “The Scream” esque) and handsomely electric figures. They also have an interesting habit of flashing unnatural hand positions that look exactly like gang signs. My art history professor calls them “gestos no naturales.” I call it straight-up gangsta.

Our first stop on the Greek parade was El Museo de Santa Cruz, which houses a good majority of El Greco’s work, including his famous portraits of the 12 disciples. The museum was free entrance also, which made us poor college students quite happy. Next on the Greek parade was lunch. I had a deliciously cheap bocadillo of loin…loin. I actually just like saying the word loin. And after that, we traversed to the incredible Catedral de Toledo, which goes down as one of the absolute coolest sights in Spain I have seen thus far. The cathedral is hidden a little bit behind equally tall buildings, so it’s a bit hard to see “en entero.” However, the inside of the Cathedral is the proverbial “cream filling.”

No pictures were allowed inside (Katie found this out first hand…NOOOOPIICHAAASSS), so I’ll just have to describe it as best as I can. La Catredral de Toledo is the gothiest of all gothic cathedrals in Spain, and easily the most beautiful. The naves are dark, but illuminated by gorgeous stained glass “rosetones”. The ceiling is robust, still high and beautiful with pointed arches and impressive fan vaulting and an assortment of columns. Near the altar is the spectacular retablo (retable) that is made of solid gold, depicting the lives of Mary and Jesus. Note that all of this is considered the pinnacle of the gothic style, right? Well, the coolest part yet to come is from the Renaissance. Story goes: in the 16^th century, homies decided that the Cathedral was a little too dark (as in, there wasn’t enough lights). So what do they do? They chop off a big part of the cathedral and put in what is called “El Transparante” a GORGEOUS sistene-chapel esque painted hole in the roof to let in more light. I’ve lifted gently (aka STOLEN) a picture from Wikipedia to illustrate this, cause I think it’s impossible to describe it without a picture. It’s quite simply breathtaking.

Oh, and that’s not all, folks. Housed within the Cathedral in its “tersoro” vault are more coveted El Greco pieces, including some of his most famous paintings of the crucified Christ. Highly recommended to anyone traveling in Europe. The Cathedral became easily my favorite cathedral in Spain after our tour.

After the magnificent Cathedral, we went to the last El Greco stop: Santo Tome, which in itself is a puny little church that is dwarfed by the magnificence of the Cathedral. So what makes it special? Ay, there’s the rub. One of El Greco’s most famous paintings (in my opinion, his magnum opus) hangs there. It is called “El entierro del conde de Orgaz,” after the count of Orgaz who is 6 feet under in a grave inside the church. Legend has it (or Catholic mythology, you choose) that the count was visited by a heavenly host at the time of his death who took his soul into heaven and buried the body in the church. El Greco magnificently painted the scene and it hangs above the tomb to this day. I decided two things. A) It’s pretty much the best painting ever, possibly better than his inimitable “Caballero con la mano en el pecho”. B) I want to draw myself as a stick figure into the painting and then have my body buried in the crypt along with the count. Yep. It is THAT cool. Again, no pictures, sadly, so you’ll have to get on Wikipedia. Also in the church was the most bizarre portrait of the Virgin Mary I have ever seen (her nose is about the size of her forehead). And of course, a lifesized sculpture of Jesus carrying the cross…but with the statute dressed up in real clothes and real hair…Hmmm…

After our tour Santo Tome, we went out for helado (stracciatela for me. Delicious!), then back to the bus, nap on the bus, back to Madrid, dinner at this overrated vegetarian all-you-can-eat place which had snobby waitresses, and then finally, BED. Overall, we felt like we had adequate time to see Toledo and El Greco proved to be a great tour guide.

Episode 18, 6/07/09 – More Gaudi, Leezards, and the beach

For our last day in Barcelona, we decided to finish our unintentional tour of Gaudi (following el plan that Rachel prepared for us) and see the last few remaining sights. A long metro ride later, and we were at Park Guell, one of the biggest tourist attractions in Spain. Park Guell, similarly to Casa Mila, was a park that Gaudi redesigned in all modernist flair, creating depth-perception-defying illusions and some very famous sculptures.

First, the hike from the metro to the Park was epic. Guell is located over, by my estimate, 300 feet above the rest of the city. In 105 degree heat, we trekked up stairs and a series of steep escalators to climb the mount. With luggage, mind you, as we had checked out of the hostel by this point. Once getting there, one is immediately greeted with impressive vistas of the city and the ability to see all the major landmarks (especially Sagrada familia).

The park itself is a ways back down the hill, split off to the side. What makes it interesting is the modernist design. Gaudi constructed platforms, alcove seating, and fountains that look like a surrealist interpretation of melting ice cream and neoclassical forums. It’s fantastic. The highlight of the entire park is the famous fountain, exhibiting the unofficial mascot of Barcelona, the dragon. But this thing doesn’t look like a dragon at all, so I have dubbed it “the leezard”. The leezard is a very colorful creature, with water pouring out of its mouth instead of fire. It’s quite impressive and attracts lots of Japanese tourists with cameras…and then it eats them. Not really. One can see the leezard on a number of other Barcelona paraphernalia including t-shirts, stamps, and keychains. Very famous, very cool. The rest of the park is just as impressive as said leezard, and after saying goodbye to said leezard, we left said park.

We had another super long hike to a metro station to get to the beach, but along the way I was struck by what appeared to be “real” Barcelona. Being a city, it’s often easy to get caught up in the touristy/commercial aspect of it. Park Guell is quite a bit removed from the center of the city, and is next to really cool/seemingly affordable neighborhoods that gleamed in the sunlight. I took some photographs and promised that I’d buy one of those apartments when I get rich and famous.

Next stop on the fun bus was the Picasso museum of Barcelona. Though not containing some of his best known works (eg. almost nothing of cubism), it wielded an impressive number of his early works, namely some of my favorites from the Blue Period. It was cool to see in person, certainly, but nothing earth-shattering. I am sad, though, that I can’t show you any photographs of these places. Oh well, if I had tried to take a picture, I’m sure one of those burly bad-attitude wielding Spanish security guards wouldn’t have appreciated it too much.

That was the last of our nerdy museum expeditions and we all could sense that we were getting a little tired. Thankfully, we’d scheduled the rest of the day for the beach. After a long walk there, we were assaulted by the Barcelona beach experience.

And yes, I do mean assaulted. Let me explain. Remember that cool/sparely populated beach we went to previously called Matalascanas? Well, this isn’t it folks. Barcelona beach is SO CROWDED! Think of an L.A. beach, but add twice as many people. We thankfully found an open spot (stalking some people who were leaving) and set up shop. Unfortunately, there were these ANNOYING merchant vendors who were trying to shop on us a little by offering a variety of novelty trash while screaming at the top of their lungs. “Aguacervezabeer! Aguacervezabeer!” the damn cry is like death-knoll! And then the Asians with attitudes asking us if we wanted a massage! We first politely thanked them…but then they returned…the same ones! I’ve dramatized the resulting effects for your pleasure.

Vendor: Quieres masaje? Doyouwanna massaasagggee?

Justin: Go away…

Vendor: Very nice, yes?

Colin: No. It’s not.

Vendor (grabbing Nick’s arm): Massage?

Nick: NO! Please no.

*wait for three minutes*

Vendor: Doyouwanna masssaaaggeee?

As you can imagine, it made the experience a little frustrating. As always, the experience was assuaged greatly by the presence of friends and companionship. I’ve been so glad to be able to get closer to some of these amazing people. These truly must be the friendships that I will never lose.

Back to the blog: We left the beach feeling rested and prepared for the trip home. Little did we know of the adventures that still awaited us. Coming “home” to Sevilla was a little bit like the last 1/3 of the movie Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King. Everything that could POSSIBLY prevent Frodo from throwing that damn ring in prevents him from throwing that damn ring in. We went to the train station to catch a train that would lead us straight to the airport (and we could use our metro passes). As we looked for the train to take us there, we couldn’t find it on the map. We individually asked some attendants who had never heard of this line before. Uh-oh. Challenge: you have 30 minutes to find an alternate route to the airport since the train line you were going to take doesn’t exist at all. Through some studying of maps and asking more attendants, we managed to find a route, though it put everyone on thin ice in terms of sanity. Thankfully though, we DID find a route that would take us to the airport and we managed to make it there with a little time to spare. We were absolutely exhausted and one long plane ride later, we finished up our epic weekend in Barcelona.

Episode 17, 6/6/08 – Barcelona is expensive/expansive/Gothic!!

This is a continuation from the last blog post on the same day because the day was so long and epic, that I couldn’t possibly put it in only one post. Continued from our chocolate deliciousness, I will resume my tale of travel.

After the chocolate museum and our foray into Modernism, we made a trip back in time and into the heart of the city, the aptly-named Gothic quarter. You must imagine my excitement going into a place called the “Gothic quarter”. How metal, right? Indeed it was. 50% or more of the buildings have some remnants from the 12^th century, the highlight of which is of course la Catedral de Barcelona. In every city I’ve ever been to in Spain, if it has a cathedral, it’s almost criminal NOT to visit it. Unfortunately in this case, I wish I would have skipped it.

Thankfully la Catedral de Barcelona is free entrance. And I suppose that should say something about the quality of the preservation of the cathedral. Whereas the Catedral de Sevilla and the Catedral de Toledo (forthcoming episode) are preserved excellently and take into consideration the lighting and display of “tersoros” (treasure/artifacts) of the church, Barcelona is clearly in ruin. They’ve actually tried to initiate a “save the cathedral” kind of program by encouraging visitors to donate and “sponsor a stone”. Clearly, this hasn’t been working well for them. Another example of a flawed Spanish business model.

The outside looks nice enough. The facades are quite gothic, lots of pointed arches, all that lovely stuff. It’s a really well-built cathedral, but the problem is that no one is keeping it up… We went inside, but were sorely disappointed to realize that we could only enter about1/4 of the entire cathedral. The stones are dirty, the floors are “original” in the worst sense”, and the lighting doesn’t showcase much of anything besides dirt. We got to listen in a little on a mass that was going on (part of the reason why we couldn’t see very much of the cathedral).

Something else I must mention because I feel like it epitomizes the …how should I say…difficulties that the Catholic Church has been having in adjusting to the modern age. Take a look at the following photo. It’s an offertory with prayer candles. Electric prayer candles. You put in a euro and a small “Lite-Brite”-esque light pops up. I’m not going to parse words; I was quite offended at the sight. Without going into too much detail, there’s something inherently comforting and spiritual at the glimpse of a burning candle and the idea that your prayer will be heard, represented by this flickering tenuous mass in front of you. Don’t tell me that the Barcelona parish, albeit poor, couldn’t afford some daggum votives! This is one instance in which adapting to “modern” ways just isn’t a good idea, guys. It’s not quite the biggest issue that the Catholic church is facing right now, but I just can’t let this go unpunished and uncommented.

The rest of the Cathedral was unimpressive, so we went outside in under 15 minutes to the rest of the Gothic quarter. Uncharacteristically gothic (perhaps), there was a market, called the “Mercat Gotico” that sold a variety of medieval styled antiques (some of them genuine, some of them cleverly disguised neogothic imitations). In any case, the display of goods was impressive, and I couldn’t go without splurging just a teensey bit.

But wait, our day isn’t even finished! One last stop before dinner at the famous Arc de Triunfo de Barcelona which was made in 1888 for the Exposicion Barcelona. It was super-big, super-red, and very photogenic. It’s also located in a particularly cool part of town, so we sat down and chilled for a while before returning to the hostel and dinner.

I should now divulge some insider info that one wouldn’t know unless one has been to Barcelona. It is damn expensive. I’ll turn back the hands of time (like R. Kelly) for a second to Friday night (one day before this blog post). It was that night that we realized that Barcelona is expensive. VERY expensive. Everything costs about double what it would in Sevilla. So when we tried to have “a nice sit-down dinner” that night, we were quite surprised at the menu’s list of prices. Specifically, there are so things that are different in Barcelona besides just meals. The metro is the quickest and easiest way of getting around (avoiding the heat, especially), but at the same time, constant ticket purchases WILL stack up. For our Saturday night dinner, we decided to do things a little differently and cook dinner at the hostel. Stephanie and I prepared Tinto de Verano concoctions in addition to pasta with red sauce while Nick helped and provided excellent cooking music from his laptop. I never thought that Ruff Ryder’s anthem could be considered cooking music. Overall, it was a cheaper endeavor than the Friday night dinner and provided for a lot of fun laughs and memories.

NO, that’s not all, folks. To top off our couldn’t-get-any-better day, we took the metro to Las Fuentes Magicas, again, aptly named, the magical fountains. Magical they were indeed. Las Fuentes Magicas is a light/water show that is put on in a big plaza near the government offices in Barcelona. It’s awesome in the truest sense of the world. Our merry troup merrily alighted on a wall (yes, on top of a wall) and had a terrific view of the spectacle. I’ll let the pictures speak for themselves, hopefully. Add to that good conversation and a soft fountain spray and it’s a day I’ll never forget.

Episode 16, 06/06/09 – An unintentional tour of Gaudi

Saturday por la manana, we embarked on our excellent tour of Barcelona by first getting breakfast at the local supermarket. Haha, that’s a very necessary thing, you see. I quickly devoured my “donuts” (pronounced “doh-noots”). I should also mention something cool. Hostels are a cool place to make new friends. We met this kid named Nick (not to be confused with our very own golly Caucasian giant, Nick), who had been living in Barcelona for the past 6 weeks. He accompanied our merry troupe and gave directions and suggestions of where to go. First stop, the hospital. (The Hospital? What is it? It’s a big building with patients in it, but that’s not important right now).

We packed up and went to the Hospital de Santa Creu. The hospital was built in the early to mid 1800’s (if my memory serves me) for a purpose that is now defunct. It is now the most pimpingly-awesome real-life working hospital of all time. I’ve enclosed pictures to demonstrate its awesomeness. We saw a few older patients being wheeled around and lots of excellent architecture. Haha, my friends played a cruel/funny trip on me by leading me into the psyche ward and trying to leave me there. Lol. “This is an intervention!” Like that intervention that Michael tried to pull on Meredith in The Office.

After we regained our sanity, we went to the most insanely twisted architecture that exists in Spain. The famous La Sagrada Familia de Barcelona, created by Anton Gaudi. Anton Gaudi was a modernist dude with a imagination like a dark labyrinth. However, his death and lack of funding have halted construction to this day and you can donate funds to keep construction going (estimated completion now is at 2048). I can hardly describe it without getting into complex poetical discoursing. I guess you’ll just have to sit through it for a while.

Sagrada familia is like stepping into a vivid nightmare, combining the sheer awe of the New Testament with things that you don’t like remembering from deep in your subconscious. The inside has elements of neogothic, famous “Gaui arches”, and columns. It’s twisted, warped vision of perspective almost gives it the sense that it defies physics. It’s indescribably fantastic in person and was easily one of my favorite sights of Spain so far. I’ll give just a brief description of my favorite part: the façade of the crucifixion of Christ. Whereas many other facades will contain the standard ole’ Christ crucified with Jesus in somber, almost painless resignation and Mary + others looking on stoically, Gaudi’s designs for the façade show horror in Jesus’ defeated posture and pain that beset Mary and the disciples. The thing I love about the architecture and the sculpture of Sagrada familia is that it depicts emotion without being excessively gaudy. Instead of gaudy, it’s more Gaudi…ha…ha…ha…ha. For example, look at the sculpture of Jesus being betrayed with a kiss by Judas. Note the expressionless look in Judas’ eyes and the silent horror in Jesus’ lips as he knows it will lead to his death. It’s powerful. Never before have I been so emotionally involved with Christ Jesus’ suffering as I have when looking at these magnificent sculptures. I’ve attached pictures so that you can get a better idea of the magnitude of this place.

I could go on for hours about this place, but I think it’s best to move on. We sort of unintentionally did a tour of the greatest hits of Gaudi. He was especially prevalent in Barcelona, so we got to see firsthand his genius while traversing the city. Ironically enough, all of the Gaudi works that we saw in Barcelona we later discussed in detail in our Spanish art class as the paradigm of classic modernism. Cool stuff.

Next was Casa Mila. Another Gaudi classic. It was an apartment building that Gaudi re-designed with his bizarre modernist style and turned it into one of the top attractions in Spain. Now, people don’t live there and it has been converted into a Gaudi museum of sorts. The main attraction of the place is the architecture, obviously, and the incredible terrace. We teleported up to the terrace (no, really) and got to see some of the most excellent views of Barcelona that you can get from the interior city. I’ve again, attached some pictures for reference’s sake.

Next stop, chocolate! The chocolate museum of Barcelona. This tasty museum covered the history of chocolate in Spain, starting from colonization to today. Not only was the museum fun and informative, but also our entrance ticket was made out of chocolate. Needless to say, it didn’t last the entire visit. There was also a lip-smacking amount of chocolate reproductions of famous artwork, the highlight being La Pieta. The only downside to viewing this art was that there were these two annoying kids chasing themselves silly around the museum and screaming. When one of them smacked into a pole, I giggled a little bit and enjoyed the silence. We’re gonna take a bit of a break from blogging at this point because believe it or not, the day is only halfway done. More to come, my chocolaty friends!