Our hostel was nice, but more like a hotel, lacking the intimacy and funkyness that we loved so much when we went to Barcelona. Add to that a general sense of anesthetic unfriendliness…and well, that’s that. We left our bags and went via Metro to Plaza Eliptica to go see Toledo.
Doing Toledo earlier on was a great decision, especially in part because the weather was so excellent. Toledo is kind of like the idyllic image of a shining city on a hill. It’s this gorgeous town (definitely not city) situated on some of the prettiest hills I’ve ever seen in my entire life and covered with quaint little houses. It really hasn’t changed all too much design-wise from when El Greco was painting it in the Middle Ages. Speaking of El Greco, sort of like how our Barcelona trip was a tour of Barcelona through Gaudi, Toledo was a tour of Toledo through El Greco, one of the best painters in the history of Spanish art.
Gotta explain a little about El Greco before I continue. Literal translation of his name is “the Greek.” This is because he was Greek. No, really. How apt. His real name, Doménikos Theotokópoulos, is far too complicated for the history books apparently, so they gave him this catchy nickname that sounds like a delicious Mediterranean entree. El Greco was also the original inventor of West-Side gangsta rap hand gestures. Also a “no, really” moment. El Greco paints in a style unlike any other. His figures are extremely elongated (think “The Scream” esque) and handsomely electric figures. They also have an interesting habit of flashing unnatural hand positions that look exactly like gang signs. My art history professor calls them “gestos no naturales.” I call it straight-up gangsta.
Our first stop on the Greek parade was El Museo de Santa Cruz, which houses a good majority of El Greco’s work, including his famous portraits of the 12 disciples. The museum was free entrance also, which made us poor college students quite happy. Next on the Greek parade was lunch. I had a deliciously cheap bocadillo of loin…loin. I actually just like saying the word loin. And after that, we traversed to the incredible Catedral de Toledo, which goes down as one of the absolute coolest sights in Spain I have seen thus far. The cathedral is hidden a little bit behind equally tall buildings, so it’s a bit hard to see “en entero.” However, the inside of the Cathedral is the proverbial “cream filling.”
No pictures were allowed inside (Katie found this out first hand…NOOOOPIICHAAASSS), so I’ll just have to describe it as best as I can. La Catredral de Toledo is the gothiest of all gothic cathedrals in Spain, and easily the most beautiful. The naves are dark, but illuminated by gorgeous stained glass “rosetones”. The ceiling is robust, still high and beautiful with pointed arches and impressive fan vaulting and an assortment of columns. Near the altar is the spectacular retablo (retable) that is made of solid gold, depicting the lives of Mary and Jesus. Note that all of this is considered the pinnacle of the gothic style, right? Well, the coolest part yet to come is from the Renaissance. Story goes: in the 16th century, homies decided that the Cathedral was a little too dark (as in, there wasn’t enough lights). So what do they do? They chop off a big part of the cathedral and put in what is called “El Transparante” a GORGEOUS sistene-chapel esque painted hole in the roof to let in more light. 
I’ve lifted gently (aka STOLEN) a picture from Wikipedia to illustrate this, cause I think it’s impossible to describe it without a picture. It’s quite simply breathtaking.
Oh, and that’s not all, folks. Housed within the Cathedral in its “tersoro” vault are more coveted El Greco pieces, including some of his most famous paintings of the crucified Christ. Highly recommended to anyone traveling in Europe. The Cathedral became easily my favorite cathedral in Spain after our tour.
After the magnificent Cathedral, we went to the last El Greco stop: Santo Tome, which in itself is a puny little church that is dwarfed by the magnificence of the Cathedral. So what makes it special? Ay, there’s the rub. One of El Greco’s most famous paintings (in my opinion, his magnum opus) hangs there. It is called “El entierro del conde de Orgaz,” after the count of Orgaz who is 6 feet under in a grave inside the church. Legend has it (or Catholic mythology, you choose) that the count was visited by a heavenly host at the time of his death who took his soul into heaven and buried the body in the church. El Greco magnificently painted the scene and it hangs above the tomb to this day. I decided two things. A) It’s pretty much the best painting ever, possibly better than his inimitable “Caballero con la mano en el pecho”. B) I want to draw myself as a stick figure into the painting and then have my body buried in the crypt along with the count. Yep. It is THAT cool. Again, no pictures, sadly, so you’ll have to get on Wikipedia. Also in the church was the most bizarre portrait of the Virgin Mary I have ever seen (her nose is about the size of her forehead). And of course, a lifesized sculpture of Jesus carrying the cross…but with the statute dressed up in real clothes and real hair…Hmmm…
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