Episode 5, 07/02/2009 – Oh, and there’s the Rosetta Stone.

My last full day in London was devoted to my Mecca: the British Museum. Oh, and how found am I of the British Museum. The last time I went to the BM in the summer of 2008, it was completely overwhelming. As with so many of the galleries, almost every piece is crucial to our understanding of these ancient cultures. And so many of the pieces themselves are legendary, like the Rosetta Stone, several complete copies of the Book of the Dead, the Sutton Hoo helmet, etc. I resolved on my second trip to the museum, that I would take things more slowly, focusing only on the things I most wanted to see and hoping that I could get through everything in a single day. We started early, around 10 I think, and went straight to Egypt. Sorry Oceania, Korea, late Victorian porcelain, clocks of the ages, Africa, and the 20^th century in general: I just didn’t have time to get to you guys.

Triaging, we started in Egypt, as I said. First thing to note is that in Egypt, there are always 100 million screaming children with coloring books trying to shove American tourists out of the way. Oh, and at the exibit about Egypt, too, there are always 100 million screaming children with coloring books trying to shove American tourists out of the way. It wasn’t quite as bad this time around. I WAS able to hear myself think. The museum moved the Rosetta Stone to the bottom floor, so that thinned the crowds a little. It’s a little scary looking at a dead 6000 year-old corpse, better preserved than you when you die. And their teeth! Geez, I never wanted to brush my teeth so badly before in my life. One poor woman actually died of a bad abscess, a consequence of all of her corn meal being infested with dust and rocks over the years of desert winds. Ouch. Sorry madam. Ancient Egypt is irresistibly fascinating for me, especially middle and late kingdoms. The exhibit on Akhenaton was sadly gone, but the rest of it was just as thrilling as the first time I saw it. Highlight still being the famous “weighing of the hearts” passage from the Book of the Dead in full living Technicolor in front of my eyes…with zombies. No, really. Check it out and see.

Moving on, moving on. I spent a lot of time in the middle east exhibits, notably Islamic art/architecture, which was just getting started in 2008, but is now a flourishing exhibit. I found it cool that some of the relics/pottery/cool ass swords were found originally in Spain in places like Granada and Sevilla. Gotta rep my Muslim homie ancients. After Islam and Egypt was East Asia. The Japan gallery hadn’t changed a bit, but the scrolls and swords were pretty and shiny and that made me happy. The China gallery had acquired some new loveliness, especially a detailed scroll depicting scenes from Sayuki, the Journey West. Extremely cool and very rare. We perused some minor exhibits (not worth commenting on, tragically) and went to the new stuff, backwards of what I had originally intended.

The BM had a completely new exhibit for me. It was titled “Enlightenment” and served two functions. First, to air condition me, as the rest of the museum lacked A/C and the heat was SWELTERING. Second, to recreate how the original museum would have looked like in the 1800’s and to compile some of the original objects displayed in its early stages. Pretty neat, yah? It was fascinatingly cool. I especially loved the exhibit on sorcery LMAO still a topic of interest for scientists at the time. Also: it was funny how much of the history the old British folk got WRONG. For example, arrowheads were considered “fairy weapons” by some (seriously), and a lot of fossilized sea-creatures mistaken for mythical beasts. Oh, old British folk…Well, anyway, science has evolved. The new exhibit was a good break from my usual forte, and allowed us to cool down a little. Afterwards, we exited the museum to have lunch at a pub called “Munchkins” (LOLZ) located only a few blocks from the museum. I decided to be brave and sample my first bit of authentic British cuisine. I had a pork pie and it, believe it or not, was quite delicious. We went back to the museum after that.

Greek and Roman statues and pottery were the next steps and here is where we started hitting the wall. It was SO DAGGUM HOT IN THAT MUSEUM. Maybe the A/C busted, because confused-looking staff members were toting around portable A/C units to cool themselves. Greek and Roman pottery CAN all start to look the same, sadly, if you don’t know the mythology. We got overwhelmed by the mass of it all, moved on to statuary, (oh, Hadrian…) and then exited. We did manage to get to see the Rosetta Stone again, and like before, it’s practically a religious experience just looking at it. We owe so much to it…

I could really go on with everything else that we saw but I would bore you. Rest assured more details are available for the detail-minded. We dined again at Yo! (a different location though, I didn’t realize it was a chain restaurant). I need to expand that chain into the Americas, cause dammit, it’s too good to just be on one side of the Atlantic. Anyways, on to the other white meat of the day: SHAKESPEARE! Remember waaaaay back when I told you in Episode 1 that I was buying tickets to the Globe Theatre? Well, our efforts came to fruition that night when we were treated to EXCELLENT seats to see As You Like It. As You Like It is such a bizarre play, but I loved it immensely, especially the experience of being there. The acting was absolutely 100% top notch. The play was fast-paced, hilarious, rewarding to people who know the language well, visually spectacular, and most of all: fun. It was great fun. After the strange musical Monty-Pythonesque song-n’-dance number at the end, everyone took a bow. We walked out into the chill night air and back across the Millennium Bridge and I said goodbye to London. It certainly won’t be the last goodbye I’ll say to it.

We had the early morning flight out, so that was it for London. I want to thank you all again for keeping up with the blog and for listening to my ramblings. I hope it has been vicarious fun for you as it was fun for me. Now, I’ll be back to regular blogging, so stay tuned.