It's time to unearth the ugly truth about America's new reigning "techno diva." The catchy single "Just Dance" and follow-up single "Poker Face" seem innocent and catchy enough, but after I'm done with you, you'll see that this whack chick is an abominable sell-out.I'm approaching my argument as I would a history lesson. I didn't always hate Lady Gaga. I heard about her WAYYY back in early April 2007 when she was first making major waves in the internet techno community as the newest brainchild of producers RedOne, the geniuses behind Robyn's newest electro-hip-hop comeback. Lady Gaga was unique in that she had a definite techno sensibility paired with the flashy performance style of glam rock, ala "Black Cherry"-era Goldfrapp. Her original single "Boys Boys Boys" started getting a bit of club play and I started taking notice.
Gaga finally got signed to a major label and produced the ORIGINAL single "Just Dance". It is here that I must be clear. The ORIGINAL club mix of the single in August 2007 played on techno radio was a fun jammin' techno track, heavily sythesized, heavy drums, fun danceable shit. The closest thing you can find now that resembles this version is the album cut on her album "The Fame", but note that the original version had no Colby O' Donnis. I liked the single because it had major crossover appeal. Lady Gaga's crazy pop antics and her mastery of catchy, danceable hooks had all the hallmarks of doing what Cascada failed to do in 2005/2006: introduce the mainstream pop crowd into the joys of true dance music, put hooks in 'em, and real 'em in with continually powerful hits.
But here is where my hate train leaves the station. Gaga, the shallow performer that she is, got a break on "Dancing With The Stars" in August 2008, performing "Just Dance" in front of a major television audience. Characteristically, when the Top-40 people are forcefully introduced to techno, they wake up and realize that it's awesome. Lady Gaga suddenly had the power to make a difference in the techno world. Lady Gaga, however, did the EXACT OPPOSITE: she sold out.
As soon as she got her break, Lady Gaga teamed up with Akon's Konvict music and crossed the bridge into pop music, burning the bridge behind her. Akon put Colby O'Donnis on the track, and created the version of "Just Dance" that's on the album. Gone was the heavy synthesized pumping bass and in came Colby's whining verse and dumb lyrics. The song became Pop. "Just Dance" topped the Itunes Dance charts. Itunes, sensing the sellout...*cough cough* excuse me, "cross over" appeal of the song stopped classifying Lady Gaga as dance and moved her into Pop in August 2008. Lady Gaga had finally betrayed her roots and had become cliche, bubblegum, silly danceable pop music ala Pussycat Dolls and began being picked up by Top 40 radio stations.
But Lady Gaga's betrayl of anything called "dance" was not complete! NO! Far from it. Lady Gaga invigorated by her newfound success changed "Just Dance" EVEN MORE! There not just two versions of the single, but three! Chances are, if you turned on the radio right now, the version that you would hear features Akon and Kardinal Offishal. Let me repeat, Akon and Kardinal Offishal! The song was COMPLETELY rearranged to include the best elements of Akon and Offshal's failed single "Dangerous" and put the beat and piano hooks centered around Gaga's vocals. Almost ANY traces of the original club mix were essentially destroyed by this new version of "Just Dance", now penned the "RedOne Radio Edit".
And as to be expected, Lady Gaga finally got the break she "deserved". As soon as it became pop, "Just Dance" shot up into the Top 10 of the Hot 100. Accordingly, the techno community has completely abandoned her. Want proof? Look on her "Remixes" of "Just Dance" on Itunes. Recognize a single REPUTABLE techno remixer or DJ who has produced any of the remixes? Nope. All the remixes are produced by hack DJs or are cleverly disguised re-versions of alternate Konvict remixes. (Note that the appearance of Richard Vission, a once-respected DJ may seem slightly contradictory, but it's not. Vission hasn't had a hit in years, and is, quite honestly, desperate).
In short, Lady Gaga is a fucking sell-out. If I could have 5 minutes alone with her, this is what I would say. I'd say, Ms. Gaga, I know "The Fame" of Top 40 success is lucrative, but if you continue on this dark, dark road, 5 years from now no one will remember you. At least Cascada is still respected in the techno community for staying true to their roots. The only people who respect you are drag queens and people who don't know any better. You are quite simply now just one of the many "rising pop stars" who, without a serious course correction, will never have another hit.
Lady Gaga = FAIL. If you're at all into techno, stay away from this sell-out shit. Pick up the newest Kylie album or Amin Van Buuren's GODLIKE "Imagine" and groove on.
Strangely enough I have also had the displeasure of witnessing Lady Gaga's fall from techno-dom and I must say that I agree completely with you. She had potential but, like most rising artists in today's music industry, she decided to go for the quick road to fame that will probably not last more than a year or two at most. Had she chosen to stay in the techno realm, she may not have become popular as quickly but she would have eventually and when she did, she could have become something similar to Goldfrapp. But once again, another rising star falls short and I remain disappointed.
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